Being honest seems to be one of the hardest things in certain situations. Reasons ranging from our reluctance to face consequences to offending the other party all contribute to our apparent inability to be honest in certain situations.

 

Intimate relationships are the king of such situations and communication within relationships whose nature is intimate is severely handicapped at times due to our inability to be completely honest. The cute guy who asked for your number and her expensive eye liner pencil you used to jot down your gym schedule are all occasions where complete honesty is a luxury we overlook. 

 

Sex is another such occasion where all communications are heavily filtered due to a variety of reasons. The issue with stifling communications with relevance to sex is that with the overwhelming amount of information available to us, it’s possible that we might keep doing something, thinking that we’re doing the right thing when we aren’t. In a way there really is no way to beat a heart to heart about what goes on in the bedroom but the next best thing is body language.

 

Here’s a few known signs for man of something being amiss. 

 

 

 

 

 

She won’t maintain eye contact

 

 

 

Maintaining eye contact is a basic of attraction. When we like something our pupils dilate and we maintain all focus on the object of our desire, so if eye contact is minimal something is definitely wrong.

 

If she isn’t looking at you and turning her head or closing her eyes, chances are she might be shy or uncomfortable in the situation it might be a good idea to talk to her and build up her levels of comfort a little.

 

Another possible reason is that she is unwilling to kiss you. This might spring up due to a range of reasons like bad breath or distaste about somewhere your mouth has been. Facial hair scraping her face may also be a reason.

 

Whatever the reason is, it’s clear that she isn’t comfortable and that’s never good, so sit her down and ask her why.

 

 

 

 

Spaced Out

 

 

 

Sometimes a spaced out look is just preoccupation, something might be wrong at her workplace or she might have a lot on her mind but staring blankly during sex is usually a bad sign.

 

Possible reasons for this stoic expression include a lack of attraction, possible extra marital affairs and a lack of control. It’s possible that she’s interested in someone else and is just going through the motions in bed so that’s a primary concern.

 

Another reason is that some women feel that they’re being overly controlled in bed and would like a little more freedom to maneuver and experiment, so maybe letting her go on top is a good idea. 

 

 

 

 

Variety is the Spice in Bed 

 

 

 

Some girls aren’t the typical docile creatures you would expect them to be and might even rush through sex without a lot of wasted time. As weird as it is to complain about lack of foreplay being a guy, it’s important to understand that foreplay and a little romance is important to both sexes.

 

A reason for this rushed behaviour is almost always experience from a previous relationship where things were the same way and a lack of variety in previous relationships, indulge in her and things should slowly start looking up.

 

 

 

 

 

Lights Out

 

 

 

Women at times are very conscious about undressing in front of a man and might ask for the lights to be turned off.

 

This is a serious problem for men who are visual creatures by nature. The reason is mainly that she’s insecure about her body or is scared of being judged, so it’s important to build her confidence with compliments and gestures that make her feel special.

 

 

 

 

 

Almost Necrophilia 

 

 

 

This is a classic case of confusion for men and it’s a very difficult problem to address, what do you do if the girl you’re in love with just lies in bed and expects you to do all the work?

As funny as that sounds, this happens more often than is good for any guy.

 

The most possible reason is that this girl doesn’t have a lot of experience that is sexual in reason and is most likely a very shy personality who believes that the man should do all the work, as frustrating as this is there really isn’t a way to avoid this problem except by airing your concerns in the most diplomatic way so as to not offend her.

 

 

 

 

 

 

By Dilshan Senaratne